I love my day job, but the attitude of clocking in and out of an 8-5 Monday through Friday operation sometimes leaves my “clocked out” headspace feeling a little too checked out, and I start to feel restless.
I love spending my free time bouncing between projects. That could mean anything from social experiments, volunteering for non-profit events, fundraisers, supporting local businesses, finding fun ways to bring people together, or journeys of self-awareness.
Not all of these activities are super current, but if you feel like having a read they were a lot of fun and meant a lot to me.
#AMAMA (Ask me about my armpits…)
For about a year I grew out my body hair and dyed it every color you can think of. It start out as a cancer fundraiser (aptly named “Fund-RAZOR”), but quickly turned into something bigger.
I wanted to send the message that body hair is natural, and something that we take for granted given that people who go through rigorous cancer treatments lose their hair. A healthy body that does normal things should be celebrated! Life shouldn’t be taken too seriously and we should all laugh more (and I still think my rainbow fuzz pits were hilarious).
A lot of people were disturbed though, and I was actually really surprised by how uncomfortable it made people. I even lost friends on social media I think. So at the end of my fundraiser, I decided to keep going with this journey to learn more about the expectations of society around women and body hair. I found it fascinating how much it did and didn’t seem to matter to people, whether they were men or women, what situation I was in each time… and also how expensive hair removal products add up to be. There’s this mentality of paying for it or being shunned… well what if money is tight and you’d rather prioritize money somewhere else?
I’d never felt more anxious and simultaneously self confident that during this little experiment. It was interesting to see who chose distance, and which friends were uplifting and open minded. I was constantly thinking up how I would explain it to strangers, but also found that most people didn’t notice right away. The people who cared the least were either non-binary, or bulkily motivated at the gym. Once strangers did notice though, after curiosity was settled it was pretty anti-climactic. The most criticism came from people I’d known my entire life.
Since that experiment, I’ve felt kinder thoughts toward all aspects of my body, weight, and makeup-less face. I think society might also be shifting a little, so woman can start relaxing. It’s so liberating to make choices about your appearance genuinely based on your own priorities, budget, preferences, without being dictated by what other people expect you to look like.
And cancer treatments like chemo really are brutal, and if I said it once I’ll say it again…
Healthy, normal bodies doing natural things (like growing body hair) are a blessing, and should be celebrated. Always.
The Bernie Sanders Effect
When Bernie Sanders announced his run for president, that was when I first felt empowered to get involved in things that weren’t in my comfort zone.
I had never paid attention to anything like politics, public schools, healthcare, immigration, environmental responsibility etc… up until this point because it always felt like someone elses job. Even if I did manage to wrap my head around understanding socio-economics, what could someone like me possibly do to get involved?
Literally, just that. Get involved. So I wrote letters to the editor of newspapers. I made phone calls and emails to the Governor, Congress and Senate. I had a lot of difficult conversations getting to the root of why a lot of people feel and vote (or not) the way they do.
I got to see him speak in Omaha, NE after the 2016 elections, and he said one thing that really stuck with me. He spoke about how a lot of people have come to him worried about the future of their communities and the state of the country, and they wish they could do something about it but just don’t think they’re knowledgeable enough, or have the experience to be qualified to run for office. All he said was, “Look at the results of the election…
…I guarantee that you’re already as knowledgeable as need be, and perhaps over qualified.”
Grassroots Growing
So I got involved. I walked miles canvassing door-to-door in different cities. I spent hours phone-banking. I helped promote events, and sped through a parade 3 times to march with different groups running for various offices.
I worked with Melissa Freelend to get on Nebraska Public Power District’s Board of Directors and Dan Quick for Legislature. I supported candidates for Hall County Board of Supervisors, and Buffalo County Board of Regents. I spent time with Republicans, Democrats, and Non-Partisans. I learned how the bottom rungs of the delegate system work, and made myself an active member of so many different community groups.
Putting in hard work for causes I truly believed in was addictive, and I said yes to helping out with everything that mattered to me. Environmental responsibility, ethics in immigration, access to healthcare and education, human rights, arts and culture.
This was also a big turning point in my life where I learned that an important part of “self care” is to say No sometimes. We can accomplish any goal, but we should also be aware of our limitations and being stretched too thin. You can’t save the world if you’re totally exhausted.
Standing Rock & NoDAPL
When I was feeling the most worn out by trying to save the world, the controversial topic at Standing Rock came up. The big question was should we build the Dakota Access pipeline, tear through Native American land, and risk the only water supply for many people in the area (with the additional risk of contaminating every other area that the Missouri River comes into contact with)?
Water is life. You cant drink oil, and money isn’t worth much if none of us are alive to spend it. I felt so discouraged by how so many people prioritized greed over risking basic health and safety for so many people that I actually lost my faith in prayer. I decided to put forth action, and instead of spending Thanksgiving Day going through the motions and making wishy-washy references to the Native American history that day, I took donations up to the people protecting the water.
Once I got there I experienced something much larger than myself, my anger, politics… something I’d never experienced before. The Water Protectors were all praying for their prayers to be heard. One giant prayer, to be heard, was being answered. It was inspiring and heartbreaking all at once. So many things humanity has appropriated so much control, that humanity needs to be the one that fixes it, like greed and corruption, taking care of our planet and our people, making the right choices. We aren’t alone though, not when we come together. I’m not sure if I’ll ever be able to put it into the perfect words, but it restored my faith in prayer a little.
Lent 2017 – 6 Churches in 6 Weeks
Traditionally for Lent, people give up something for 40 days as a reference to the story of Christ, or even for atonement for their own sins.
I think it’s a great practice to take some time to be self-aware, and put forth energy to nurture your mind and soul. I gave up my Sunday mornings of sleeping in and went to a different Church every week (a different denomination, city, sometimes even a different religion all together).
This was one of the most challenging experiences for me because it forced a ton of self-reflection. I think I needed to come to terms with having a considerable amount of social anxiety, but with focus and purpose I was able to build up enough confidence to be brave and go anyway. Church is a place of belonging, and although it’s widely known that everyone can (and is encouraged) to join in I never quite felt like I belonged. Not that I was never turned away – people were always very kind. It was just difficult.
It was also draining to experience how similar yet different each Sunday was. Each preached about the importance of having faith, but also spent a considerable amount of time highlighting things that seemed insignificant to me (likes on social media, renovating new carpets, praying for being tired after not getting enough sleep one night, etc.). There were also different levels of conservatism that conflicted with my beliefs of women’s, lgbt+ and immigrant’s rights.
However uncomfortable I was at times, I do think it’s excellent, and important, to feel uncomfortable sometimes. To grow, we must be able to entertain other beliefs even if we don’t accept them. We need to know how to reach out and understand people who don’t think like us, because in the end we are all the same. We need the same things out of life… but it’s also important to find your tribe. Find the people who think like you, that you can be comfortable around, and rest your soul with. Let’s just not forget how to be uncomfortable, because that’s where the real work gets done.
greenifer 